The I Miss the Old Days Complaint Thread

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  • LeatherGryphonLeatherGryphon Posts: 11,516

    Heavy rain here, several times during the day.  I spied a sunny opening in the downpour and toddled quickly out to the mailbox, and made it almost back to the porch before it was plain that a curtain of rain came again.frown

  • Charlie JudgeCharlie Judge Posts: 12,745

    LeatherGryphon said:

    Heavy rain here, several times during the day.  I spied a sunny opening in the downpour and toddled quickly out to the mailbox, and made it almost back to the porch before it was plain that a curtain of rain came again.frown

    At least it should help wash some of the smoke out of the air. 

  • LeatherGryphonLeatherGryphon Posts: 11,516
    edited July 2023

    Non-complaint:  Pleased to hear about the recent announcement of significant evidence of Gravitational background waves.yes  Ripples in spacetime caused by multiple supermassive black holes orbiting each other in the centers of galaxies.  Up to now, what we've seen of gravitational waves were tiny blips caused by individual neutron stars or black holes merging with wavelengths in the millimeter range.  The new discovery, using a completely different measurement method, detects gravitational waves with wavelengths of several lightyears, reflecting the massive nature of the objects that created the waves..  The universe is a'buzz with vibrations in both electromagnetic fields and spacetime itself.  If ever there was poignant aspect to the Moody Blues poem "The Word" it's now.smiley

    The Word -- Graeme Edge

    This garden universe vibrates complete
    Some may get a sound so sweet
    Vibrations reach on up to become light
    And then through gamma, out of sight

    Between the eyes and ears there lie
    The sounds of color and the light of a sigh
    And to hear the sun, what a thing to believe

    But it's all around if we could but perceive
    To know ultra violet, infra-red and X-rays
    Beauty to find in so many ways

    Two notes of the chord, that's our full scope
    But to reach the chord is our life's hope
    And to name the chord is important to some
    So they give a word and the word is Om,  

       -- Graeme Edge

    But now it needs a new stanza.  I'm no poet but it needs something like:

    Edited to flesh out & improve the earlier draft:

    Whole galaxies dance to the drone of gravity's cosmic hums,

    Brief chirps belie the moment of crashing suns,

    Stretched to breaking, stars vanish and spacetime dies,

    Their ancient screams eventually shake all worlds' skies.

    indecision

     

     

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    Post edited by LeatherGryphon on
  • hacsarthacsart Posts: 2,025

    well, at least the tornado was way north of us.. and in the last 3 hours we have picked up strong winds and the temp went from 29C to 16C (over 3 hours or so)

  • kyoto kidkyoto kid Posts: 41,063

    LeatherGryphon said:

    Non-complaint:  Pleased to hear about the recent announcement of significant evidence of Gravitational background waves.yes  Ripples in spacetime caused by multiple supermassive black holes orbiting each other in the centers of galaxies.  Up to now, what we've seen of gravitational waves were tiny blips caused by individual neutron stars or black holes merging with wavelengths in the millimeter range.  The new discovery, using a completely different measurement method, detects gravitational waves with wavelengths of several lightyears reflecting the massive nature of the objects that created the waves..  The universe is a'buzz with vibrations in both electromagnetic fields and spacetime itself.  If ever there was poignant aspect to the Moody Blues poem "The Word" it's now.smiley

    The Word -- Graeme Edge

    This garden universe vibrates complete
    Some may get a sound so sweet
    Vibrations reach on up to become light
    And then through gamma, out of sight

    Between the eyes and ears there lie
    The sounds of color and the light of a sigh
    And to hear the sun, what a thing to believe

    But it's all around if we could but perceive
    To know ultra violet, infra-red and X-rays
    Beauty to find in so many ways

    Two notes of the chord, that's our full scope
    But to reach the chord is our life's hope
    And to name the chord is important to some
    So they give a word and the word is Om,  

       -- Graeme Edge

    But now it needs a new stanza.  I'm no poet but it needs something like

    "Gravity dances to cosmic hums,

    Brief chirps belie crashing suns,

    .... ta-da-da-da-dum.... ta-da-da-da-dum,indecision

     

     

    ...read about that yesterday.  Makes me wonder if galaxies aren't just gigantic accreton dsks  

  • kyoto kidkyoto kid Posts: 41,063
    edited July 2023

    hacsart said:

    well, at least the tornado was way north of us.. and in the last 3 hours we have picked up strong winds and the temp went from 29C to 16C (over 3 hours or so)

    ...a tornado, to the north, in Canada? 

    Post edited by kyoto kid on
  • AgitatedRiotAgitatedRiot Posts: 4,437

    Tornado Alley includes some of northern Ontario, Canada, to Lake Superior.

  • hacsarthacsart Posts: 2,025

    several, actualy - Alberta, Central Ontario and possibly Quebec..

    kyoto kid said:

    hacsart said:

    well, at least the tornado was way north of us.. and in the last 3 hours we have picked up strong winds and the temp went from 29C to 16C (over 3 hours or so)

    ...a tornado, to the north, in Canada? 

  • ZyloxZylox Posts: 787

    kyoto kid said:

    hacsart said:

    well, at least the tornado was way north of us.. and in the last 3 hours we have picked up strong winds and the temp went from 29C to 16C (over 3 hours or so)

    ...a tornado, to the north, in Canada? 

    About a week ago, we had funnel cloud warnings from Eugene to Vancouver. Funnel clouds are just tornados that are too lazy to touch the ground.

  • hacsarthacsart Posts: 2,025
    edited July 2023

    Video from the tornado north of us - Didsbury.. nice little town.. 40 miles north of us

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ii46SWfIrZA

    Post edited by hacsart on
  • AgitatedRiotAgitatedRiot Posts: 4,437

    Poor Kitty.

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  • kyoto kidkyoto kid Posts: 41,063
    edited July 2023

    ...at about the 2:11 mark that looks like it may be an F2.

    Post edited by kyoto kid on
  • WendyLuvsCatzWendyLuvsCatz Posts: 38,230
    edited July 2023

    my E drive on my other Windows 7 computer just suddenly vanished with my desktop, it created a temporary paging file and now I have no programs nothing as all were swapdisked to that drive (it's boot drive is only 200GB)

    This cannot be a coincidence 

    something is destroying my hardware 

    I cannot afford to fix it though I do have an image backup of some not all of it so things are look very bleak

    a lot of the content is not backed up as was too much, mainly all of my Carrara projects and content, all my iClone content, my recent music and projects I was working on

    I have a horrible feeling it was a Chinese video editing program I used on both computers that caused this.

    Post edited by WendyLuvsCatz on
  • Bunyip02Bunyip02 Posts: 8,639
    edited July 2023

    WendyLuvsCatz said:

    my E drive on my other Windows 7 computer just suddenly vanished with my desktop, it created a temporary paging file and now I have no programs nothing as all were swapdisked to that drive (it's boot drive is only 200GB)

    This cannot be a coincidence 

    something is destroying my hardware 

    I cannot afford to fix it though I do have an image backup of some not all of it so things are look very bleak

    a lot of the content is not backed up as was too much, mainly all of my Carrara projects and content, all my iClone content, my recent music and projects I was working on

    I have a horrible feeling it was a Chinese video editing program I used on both computers that caused this.

    Does not sound good Wendy ....

    EDIT - Link for Nortons Power Eraser - freebie - https://support.norton.com/sp/en/au/home/current/solutions/kb20100824120155EN

    Post edited by Bunyip02 on
  • WendyLuvsCatzWendyLuvsCatz Posts: 38,230

    Oh My why is everything a PITA

    now it's the Post Grey Squirrel

    I added him to my firewall but he still won't start

  • LeatherGryphonLeatherGryphon Posts: 11,516
    edited July 2023

    kyoto kid said:

    LeatherGryphon said:

    Non-complaint:  Pleased to hear about the recent announcement of significant evidence of Gravitational background waves.yes [snip] ...

    ...read about that yesterday.  Makes me wonder if galaxies aren't just gigantic accreton dsks  

     Yes, partly.  More going on than just spinning though.  The accretion aspect is only effective for a "short" distance from the center.  Beyond that, the degrees of freedom and lack of constant collisions or sufficient gravitational interactions with other stars, permit orbits to persist in all directions to form a sparse sphere, called the "halo" around galaxies.  Even solar systems are not just accretion disks, they too have a spherical halo, of slumbering comets, instead of stars.  When galaxies get big enough (many collisions with other galaxies), they generally settle into elliptical galaxies, but I suspect that at some point, for a limited distance, within the ellipsoid cloud, there is a prefered orbital plane as collisions weed out the off-axis stars.  And in the center, semi-chaos reigns from the maw of the monster(s) lurking there. 

    Post edited by LeatherGryphon on
  • sazzyazzcasazzyazzca Posts: 495

    AgitatedRiot said:

    Tornado Alley includes some of northern Ontario, Canada, to Lake Superior.

    The southern parts of the prairie provinces are considered by many as part of Tornado Alley as well. Manitoba has had 3 F4 and one F5 tornado since they've been rating them, as well as an unrated incident of multiple tornadoes in 1922 that caused 5 deaths, hundreds of injuries, and an estimated 2 million (1922 Canadian dollars) in damage. Saskatchewan and Alberta have both had F4 tornadoes as well. Tornado warnings and watches are very common here at this time of year.

  • AgitatedRiotAgitatedRiot Posts: 4,437
    edited July 2023
    Complaint ending up in the hospital in the middle of the night. Thank the gods just Pleurisy. Not a heart attack.
    Post edited by AgitatedRiot on
  • WendyLuvsCatzWendyLuvsCatz Posts: 38,230

    AgitatedRiot said:

    Complaint ending up in the hospital in the middle of the night. Thank the gods just Pleurisy. Not a heart attack.

    Get well soon heart 

  • LeatherGryphonLeatherGryphon Posts: 11,516
    edited July 2023

    Non-complaint:  Major winds here for a moment yesterday.  Tore away the spider web in my window.  Spider survived, web was back this morning.yes

    Regarding gravity waves:  I finally have an acceptible first draft of a new stanza for the poem "The Word" mentioned above.  Not sure how to fit it in, but I just like the sound of the stanza itself, for now.  Wheee..., I'm a poet and didn't know it.yes

    Whole galaxies dance to the drone of gravity's cosmic hums,

    Brief chirps belie the moment of crashing suns,

    Stretched to breaking, stars vanish and spacetime dies,

    Their ancient screams eventually shake all worlds' skies.

    Post edited by LeatherGryphon on
  • ZyloxZylox Posts: 787

    AgitatedRiot said:

    Complaint ending up in the hospital in the middle of the night. Thank the gods just Pleurisy. Not a heart attack.

    I've had that in the past. Not fun at all. I hope you get to feeling better soon.

     

  • LeatherGryphonLeatherGryphon Posts: 11,516
    edited July 2023

    Non-complaint:   Wheee... an ancient memory pried loose from my brain by a serendipitous YouTube clip about an old TV movie.  The title had the name "Sybil" in it and my brain alarms went off lighting up a recent (year ago) failure to remember or even find the name of the psychic/astrologer/witch/author who lived in the Melbourne, Florida area back during my college days around the '60s & 70s.    The movie had nothing to do with the person I was trying to remember, except the name.  But I had even forgotten her name.  The person I was trying to think of was Sybil Leek.   I found an article about her old house in Indialantic, Fl. where she lived during the '80s, being for sale in 2022.  The house pictured in the article was a quaint typical old Florida beach cottage, square shaped.  I remember the house, but I also seem to remember people who knew her and talked about her living in the "Round House" in Melbourne Beach (5 miles south of Indialantic) during the '70s.  Perhaps that's just a faulty memory, or perhaps she did live there at that time.  But there actually is(was?) a famous "Round House" on the beach in Melbourne Beach.  None of this is important, but I found it interesting that my brain had been armed to trigger on the word "Sybil" even though I didn't know what I was looking for, and hadn't thought about it for months.  Cool!cool  Brain power mysteries.yes

    Post edited by LeatherGryphon on
  • McGyverMcGyver Posts: 7,053

    Complaint since I last looked there have been 16 posts, new post count says 2... this time I made it a point to note the last post I read, which was KK's post asking "...a tornado, to the north, in Canada?"

    The forum's software... Booooo!

     

    I'm wondering if this is another problem that's a new thing... 

    In addition to not being able to upload an image for weeks, I noticed that the thread that I started for posting images to "An OT thread for images" will not load the entire last page (page 10)... it usually won't load anything past 3DLux's post from August 2022...

    Sometimes if I leave the page alone it might load after a long time... maybe ten minutes or more... other times doing that results in a timeout or gateway error.

    But for weeks I can't get it to fully load normally... all the other older pages 1 to 9 load normally, but not 10.


    So what I'm wondering is (if anyone knows about this kind of thing) is the page itself too heavy with images?

    Is there some sort of attachment data limit for posts?... that seems like it would be a thing, since there is a limit to the number of characters for a post... I actually found out what that was a couple of years ago when I wrote a whole short story as a post... it's a lot, but there is a limit.

    I'm wondering if by trying to not add too many new posts (effectively "bumping" the thread, which is frowned upon) adding too many new images by editing the individual posts over time, too many times, screws something up... 

    It's pretty much an academic question at this point as image uploading is completely broken for me... I know some folks have said to try late at night, but I have and it still doesn't work... 2am or 3am in the morning seems kinda late... (and 11pm, 12am and 1am have also been tried)...( unless it's a very specific window like between 3:58'02 and 4:03'32 AM...)... but whatever... 

  • McGyverMcGyver Posts: 7,053
    edited July 2023

    AgitatedRiot said:

    Complaint ending up in the hospital in the middle of the night. Thank the gods just Pleurisy. Not a heart attack.

    That sounds ghastly... could it be the air quality? Like all that smoke from Canada?... or do you have a preexisting lung issue... or interaction with some medication?... Or pneumonia?... 

    Sorry if it seems like I'm asking too much personal information... I generally only ask for people's social security numbers or passwords, but medical information I try to avoid because most people don't like to talk about their medical issues unless they are really funny.

    Well, at least it wasn't a heart attack...

    Heart attacks do suck though... I dodged one in elementary school... a friend of mine threw half a plastic heart model at me and I dodged it and it hit the girl standing in back of me, so we both got in trouble... me more so because I was the usual suspect in all wrongdoings... I made it a point that the next time someone threw something at me I should either catch it or let it hit me because if it missed me I could be responsible for not being a proper human shield.

    Anyway, I hope your lungs are better now... unless I'm totally wrong about what Pleurisy is... or you misspelled "leprosy"... or worse yet "leprechauns"... I'm not sure how one mistakes leprechauns for a heart attack, but I'm sure there might be a totally plausible reason for that... 

    Also I hope it wasn't leprechauns and the doctor misspelled it and now you are being treated for Pleurisy instead of a leprechaun infestation...

    Also, I hope he didn't misspell "plague"... that would suck too... especially if was Leprechaun Plague... 

    By the way, I'm not blaming Canada for being on fire which may have caused your lung issues I'm just pointing a finger at them and wondering why they didn't rake and vacuum the forest floor like the city of Belgium did... some genius who was in the news a lot a while ago and apparently still is, claimed that raking and vacuuming forests prevents forest fires... and also that Belgium is a city and that the Continental Army stormed airports... not in that order, but it hardly matters, because there was lots more stuff like that and none of it made any sense anyway... 

    But anyway, sorry to hear you have a lung or leprechaun problem, breathing problems are no fun and I'm not trying to make light of your predicament... it's just that I felt like I should say something more than "aw, that sucks" but maybe more sympathetic sounding... and also probably more detailed than just "that sucks" because that could sound like I was disappointed you weren't having a heart attack... I'm not... I mean I'm glad it's not a heart attack and you aren't hosting it, I just wanted to expand on the whole showing interest in other people's problems thing, but I usually mess it up and it becomes a big long story about something that has nothing to do with the problem at hand... which was probably breathing comfortably...

    I personally think breathing is overrated... I gave up breathing air a while ago because it was getting too expensive... if you read news articles they are always telling you that regular air is bad for you... so I started breathing designer air and that free range, cage free artisan air they only sell in boutique shops with salt crystal caves... well, technically they aren't actual caves, they are just rooms full of salt chunks and healing candles and groovy people who know how to breathe professionally... it was too much effort so I just gave up breathing altogether... I miss it a little but I feel a lot better...

    You probably shouldn't actually stop breathing, what I meant was "metaphorically breathing"... apparently I wasn't doing it right and there is a method to breathe properly and if you don't do it right, your diaphragm and esophageal plexus can cause your deltopectoral groove to become asymmetrically synced to your chakra causing your phrenic nerve to become inflamed and explode, resulting in a chain reaction where you burst into flames or something... I didn't really pay attention to the guy who was telling me that, or whatever he actually said because I was fascinated by his eyebrows which were two different shapes... one was like kinda normal, but the other one was shaped like a satellite map of Cuba... it really threw me off, so I'm sorry I can't be of any help with advanced breathing instructions.

    I don't know if any of this has made you feel any better... hopefully you aren't feeling worse now or are panicking because you now think you might be infested with leprechauns... the odds of that are pretty slim... plague would be way more likely... but I'm sure if you had a plague of any sort, your doctor would have recognized it and given you something for that...

    Medicine that is... not a lollipop or one of those sample packs of foot fungus medication they have laying around, which apparently you shouldn't eat when the doctor steps out of the room... In my defense they looked a lot like those cod paste tubes they sell in IKEA and other Scandinavian flimsy furniture shops... Cod paste by the way, tastes great on crackers or small compressed sawdust discs (I'm presuming that's what Knäckebröd is made out of)... but you really shouldn't brush your teeth with it just because it's in a tube... 

    Anyway, I hope you feel better and heal properly really soon and everything goes back to normal.

    Remember, laughter is the best medicine... unless you have a lung problem, then I suppose it could probably cause a lot of problems... but laughter is a lot cheaper than medicine and proper medical treatment... so you do whatever you feel best works for you... just get well soon.

    Post edited by McGyver on
  • AgitatedRiotAgitatedRiot Posts: 4,437

    McGyver said:

    AgitatedRiot said:

    Complaint ending up in the hospital in the middle of the night. Thank the gods just Pleurisy. Not a heart attack.

    That sounds ghastly... could it be the air quality? Like all that smoke from Canada?... or do you have a preexisting lung issue... or interaction with some medication?... Or pneumonia?... 

    Sorry if it seems like I'm asking too much personal information... I generally only ask for people's social security numbers or passwords, but medical information I try to avoid because most people don't like to talk about their medical issues unless they are really funny.

    Well, at least it wasn't a heart attack...

    Heart attacks do suck though... I dodged one in elementary school... a friend of mine threw half a plastic heart model at me and I dodged it and it hit the girl standing in back of me, so we both got in trouble... me more so because I was the usual suspect in all wrongdoings... I made it a point that the next time someone threw something at me I should either catch it or let it hit me because if it missed me I could be responsible for not being a proper human shield.

    Anyway, I hope your lungs are better now... unless I'm totally wrong about what Pleurisy is... or you misspelled "leprosy"... or worse yet "leprechauns"... I'm not sure how one mistakes leprechauns for a heart attack, but I'm sure there might be a totally plausible reason for that... 

    Also I hope it wasn't leprechauns and the doctor misspelled it and now you are being treated for Pleurisy instead of a leprechaun infestation...

    Also, I hope he didn't misspell "plague"... that would suck too... especially if was Leprechaun Plague... 

    By the way, I'm not blaming Canada for being on fire which may have caused your lung issues I'm just pointing a finger at them and wondering why they didn't rake and vacuum the forest floor like the city of Belgium did... some genius who was in the news a lot a while ago and apparently still is, claimed that raking and vacuuming forests prevents forest fires... and also that Belgium is a city and that the Continental Army stormed airports... not in that order, but it hardly matters, because there was lots more stuff like that and none of it made any sense anyway... 

    But anyway, sorry to hear you have a lung or leprechaun problem, breathing problems are no fun and I'm not trying to make light of your predicament... it's just that I felt like I should say something more than "aw, that sucks" but maybe more sympathetic sounding... and also probably more detailed than just "that sucks" because that could sound like I was disappointed you weren't having a heart attack... I'm not... I mean I'm glad it's not a heart attack and you aren't hosting it, I just wanted to expand on the whole showing interest in other people's problems thing, but I usually mess it up and it becomes a big long story about something that has nothing to do with the problem at hand... which was probably breathing comfortably...

    I personally think breathing is overrated... I gave up breathing air a while ago because it was getting too expensive... if you read news articles they are always telling you that regular air is bad for you... so I started breathing designer air and that free range, cage free artisan air they only sell in boutique shops with salt crystal caves... well, technically they aren't actual caves, they are just rooms full of salt chunks and healing candles and groovy people who know how to breathe professionally... it was too much effort so I just gave up breathing altogether... I miss it a little but I feel a lot better...

    You probably shouldn't actually stop breathing, what I meant was "metaphorically breathing"... apparently I wasn't doing it right and there is a method to breathe properly and if you don't do it right, your diaphragm and esophageal plexus can cause your deltopectoral groove to become asymmetrically synced to your chakra causing your phrenic nerve to become inflamed and explode, resulting in a chain reaction where you burst into flames or something... I didn't really pay attention to the guy who was telling me that, or whatever he actually said because I was fascinated by his eyebrows which were two different shapes... one was like kinda normal, but the other one was shaped like a satellite map of Cuba... it really threw me off, so I'm sorry I can't be of any help with advanced breathing instructions.

    I don't know if any of this has made you feel any better... hopefully you aren't feeling worse now or are panicking because you now think you might be infested with leprechauns... the odds of that are pretty slim... plague would be way more likely... but I'm sure if you had a plague of any sort, your doctor would have recognized it and given you something for that...

    Medicine that is... not a lollipop or one of those sample packs of foot fungus medication they have laying around, which apparently you shouldn't eat when the doctor steps out of the room... In my defense they looked a lot like those cod paste tubes they sell in IKEA and other Scandinavian flimsy furniture shops... Cod paste by the way, tastes great on crackers or small compressed sawdust discs (I'm presuming that's what Knäckebröd is made out of)... but you really shouldn't brush your teeth with it just because it's in a tube... 

    Anyway, I hope you feel better and heal properly really soon and everything goes back to normal.

    Remember, laughter is the best medicine... unless you have a lung problem, then I suppose it could probably cause a lot of problems... but laughter is a lot cheaper than medicine and proper medical treatment... so you do whatever you feel best works for you... just get well soon.

    Don't make me laugh. I got a Lung thing going, and it hurts when I laugh.  

  • McGyverMcGyver Posts: 7,053

    AgitatedRiot said:

    McGyver said:

    That sounds ghastly... could it be the air quality? Like all that smoke from Canada?... or do you have a preexisting lung issue... or interaction with some medication?... Or pneumonia?... 

    (...Lots of confusing and random chosen words, blah, blah, blah, etc, etc, so on and so forth...)

    Remember, laughter is the best medicine... unless you have a lung problem, then I suppose it could probably cause a lot of problems... but laughter is a lot cheaper than medicine and proper medical treatment... so you do whatever you feel best works for you... just get well soon.

    Don't make me laugh. I got a Lung thing going, and it hurts when I laugh.  

    Oh good, it's a lung thing and not the leprechaun thing... I mean it would probably be better if it was nothing instead, but if you are going to have something, leprechauns are really hard to cure... wait, sorry that's leprosy, a lung inflammation is better than having body parts falling off...

    Well, technically Leprosy (also known as "Hansen's Disease", which is not to be confused with "Hanson Disease" which is usually contracted by contact with any of the Hanson brothers or their fans, and in some rare instances just by listening to their music), which is actually a bacterial infection by either the bacterium "Mycobacterium lepromatosis" or "Mycobacterium leprae" (in case someone offers you some bacteria at a party or something, I figured you should know which bacteria to reject)... and it can usually successfully be treated with a three-drug regimen of rifampicin, dapsone and clofazimine... so technically, nowadays it's not that horrible if treated early.

    Leprechans on the other hand are harder to get rid of, but are generally easier to avoid by maintaining a proper hygiene level.

    Its interesting that most people misdiagnose leprechauns because they assume they wear green outfits, but unless you have a case of stereotypical leprechauns, traditionally leprechauns usually wore red... apparently some time in the 1800s or so imported leprechauns in the United States started wearing green outfits to distinguish themselves from the leprechauns back home and that led to different sects of leprechauns fighting each other over what was proper attire... eventually they separated into two groups, red traditional leprechauns and green stereotypical ones that became mascots for sports teams, cereal brands and assorted offensive unflattering alcoholism portrayals... eventually leprechauns found a niche in the environment and established thriving colonies where they helped maintain the ecosystem by becoming important food sources for bears, foxes and chupacabras.

    But whatever, I'm not suggesting you call your doctor to be sure they wrote the right diagnosis down, I'm sure they are good at doctor stuff and can tell lung problems from leprechauns and whatnot.

    Anyway, don't laugh at any of this, it's not funny at all, in fact none of what I write is even original as nothing anyone can come up with hasn't already been written by someone else at some time before... or even by the proverbial thousand monkeys with typewriters... which technically is an actual mathematical probability theory known as "The Infinite Monkey Theorem"... The infinite monkey theorem states that a bunch of monkey hitting keys at random on a bunch of typewriter keyboard for an infinite amount of time will almost surely type any given text, including the complete works of William Shakespeare. In fact, the monkey would almost surely type every possible finite text an infinite number of times. The theorem can be generalized to state that any sequence of events which has a non-zero probability of happening will almost certainly eventually occur, given unlimited time.

    This theory was put to the test in 1952 by the secret branch of the CIA's Monkey Works division (a pseudonym for the Advanced Monkey Development Project or "AMDP" for short, or "Adx$4J!qqqqt,,!!Gz59&2#" if the monkeys typed it)... the project was ambitious and intended to use 500 chimpanzees that showed psychic or telepathic abilities to type out Soviet missile launch codes... at first the project showed promise and the chimps began to type furiously, but eleven seconds into the test they started to fight amongst themselves and by the end of the day they'd all bashed each other to death with the typewriters, with only a handful of survivors having typed nothing more important that a not too favorable review of the Broadway musical play "My Darlin’ Aida" by Robert L. Joseph and a handful of sitcom proposals. 
    The project was shelved and the sitcoms were eventually produced by CBS, but for decades the idea was ignored.

    That changed in 2002, when lecturers and students from the University of Plymouth MediaLab Arts course used a £2,000 (equivalent to 2,542 US dollars or 50.84 Standard Goats if you are bartering with smaller livestock) grant from the Arts Council to study the literary output of real monkeys*...
    They left a computer keyboard in the enclosure of six Celebes crested macaques in Paignton Zoo in Devon, England from May 1 to June 22, with a radio link to broadcast the results on a website.
    Not only did the monkeys produce nothing but five total pages, largely consisting of the letter "S", the lead male began striking the keyboard with a stone, and other monkeys followed by urinating and defecating on the machine... Technically it was an Acer, so it was kind of expected that someone might try that, so it wasn't really factored into the study...  
    Mike Phillips, director of the university's Institute of Digital Arts and Technology (i-DAT), said that although the artist-funded project was primarily performance art, and they had learned "an awful lot" from it... especially how hard it it's to get monkey poop out of a keyboard, which is surprising harder to remove than traditional materials like beluga caviar or potato chip crumbs and that for relatively average sized monkeys, macaques can produce a huge amount of poop...
    Phillips concluded that monkeys "are not random generators. They're more complex than that.... They are furry animals with sharp teeth and have the ability to produce copious amounts of biological waste which they freely distributed everywhere... but also that they were quite interested in the screen, and they saw that when they typed a letter, something happened. There was a level of intention there... which is to say a lot for the monkey work ethic".

    To this day the experiment has not been deliberately repeated and Phillips was later replaced by a silverback gorilla with a degree in simian literature and French history.

    So as you can see there is nothing original or funny about my writing and if you do find yourself laughing, it's likely a reaction to the medication you've been given or the side effects of leprechaun plague, so it's best you go back to your doctor and give him a good lecture about proper medical treatment and if he has any of those tubes of cod paste laying around... oh wait, that was foot fungus ointment... it wasn't bad, but it needs some decent crackers to go on... 

    Anyway... Feel better.
     

     

     

    *Not to be confused with RealMonkeys the "interactive silicon monkey companions" similar to RealDolls the full sized, extremely detailed and realistically articulated human "companion" dolls.

  • AgitatedRiotAgitatedRiot Posts: 4,437
    edited July 2023

    Leprosy Is not good

    (Verse 1) In a world plagued by mystery and strife,

    There's a disease that steals away our life,

    Leprosy, a silent enemy within,

    A battle we fight, a battle we can't win.

    (Chorus) Oh, leprosy, a cruel fate we face,

    Leaving scars upon our skin, no hiding place,

    But we'll rise above, with courage in our hearts,

    Together we'll find strength, never torn apart.

    (Verse 2) Through ancient times, this illness prevailed,

    Shunned and feared, our spirits never derailed,

    A stigma attached, misconceptions grew,

    But in our hearts, the truth we always knew.

    (Chorus) Oh, leprosy, a cruel fate we face,

    Leaving scars upon our skin, no hiding place,

    But we'll rise above, with courage in our hearts,

    Together we'll find strength, never torn apart.

    (Bridge) Let's break the chains of ignorance and fear,

    With compassion and knowledge, we draw near,

    Rebuilding lives, restoring dignity,

    For every soul affected, we'll set them free.

    (Chorus) Oh, leprosy, a cruel fate we face,

    Leaving scars upon our skin, no hiding place,

    But we'll rise above, with courage in our hearts,

    Together we'll find strength, never torn apart.

    (Verse 3) With love and care, we'll heal the wounds,

    Embracing those who society ostracized too soon,

    For in unity, we'll find the cure,

    A future where no one's left unsure.

    (Chorus) Oh, leprosy, a cruel fate we face,

    Leaving scars upon our skin, no hiding place,

    But we'll rise above, with courage in our hearts,

    Together we'll find strength, never torn apart.

    (Outro) Though leprosy may bring its pain,

    Our spirits soar, unbroken like a refrain,

    We'll raise our voices, singing loud and clear,

    Leprosy won't define us, love conquers fear.

     

    Post edited by AgitatedRiot on
  • LeatherGryphonLeatherGryphon Posts: 11,516
    edited July 2023

    Quick Leprosy Fact:  Did you know that a breakthrough in leprosy understanding was discovered (or at least improved upon) in research labs at my old alma-mater, Florida Institute of Technology.  They discovered that the leprosy virus/bacteria/whatever, is able to be studied in a certain species of armadillos, being one of the only animals other than humans in which the bug is known to grow.surprise  Cool for research & humans, bummer for armadillos.indecision https://news.fit.edu/archive/rising-star-disney-comes-to-countdown-college-1983/

    Post edited by LeatherGryphon on
  • ZyloxZylox Posts: 787

    Leprosy is not a laughing matter...

  • WendyLuvsCatzWendyLuvsCatz Posts: 38,230

    if it was not a song it is now

    cannot do the rest as ran out of goes today

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